More recently, interviewed a number of marriage and human, from the men there, hear their views of women in marriage, but also from a woman who had to listen to their scorn of men.
Our aim is: to provide men and women for marriage, a mutual understanding and opportunities for self-examination in order to enhance the capacity of people to grasp the marriage.
Comments a: to force the husband Jackie Chan
Dawn in the north a university doctoral student, had worked hard in school for a semester, he could not wait to catch up to the house, hoping to return as soon as possible Stepford Wives side, enjoying a warm and relaxing holiday. Surprisingly, not to talk about the two lovers, the wife of his patience up. She continually said before dawn, so and so's husband recently got a full scholarship to the United States; so and so's husband has done a doctoral; so and so's husband returned from abroad, read the MBA has been a few foreign scrambled, annual salary of up to 80,000 U.S. dollars and so on.
In order not to lag behind the "so and so" the husband, Tian-ming from the home that night began immersed in study, a closed, two did not step forward. Had wanted to, like a good plan for all vacation not achieved. Leave before the end of dawn reluctantly said: "Although I have a seemingly bright future, but I feel like the sea, the deviation of the boat in a leaf could not find sheltered harbor."
Expert Comment: Obviously, there is this idea of women tend to have a strong sense of vanity, the so-called "wife of your husband's Wing"; In addition, they often have a strong psychological dependence, the so-called "only vine wrapped around a tree, how can there be a tree wrapped rattan. " In order to meet their vanity and dependence, they hesitate to put all kinds of pressure to bring their husbands. Of course, encouraged her husband to strive with determination, and there is nothing wrong, but if not based on the actual situation and create pressure will be counterproductive. Sentence: to force the husband of the woman is too stupid Jackie Chan.
The views of Two: slovenly
Mr. Lee likes dressed, groomed woman, while his wife has become increasingly let him down. Mr Lee said: I am the wife does not know how to choose according to their own body characteristics of clothing, much less know how to mix color. I gave her suggestions, she accused me of is a small man, Guandetaiduo. I once joked that men like beautiful women, you do not worry I was someone to seduce it? Who would have thought his wife conceited manner, "Well," a cry, and continued to go its own way.
She always believed that the conditions of her family at home better than I at first she was against the wishes of her parents, "marry" to me, she believed that she then "owed" long "wiped off" of me, so dare to live at ease lazy The Huang Lianpo life. Although I am not the kind of ramshackle men, but in the street to see well-dressed woman, the heart will always be something missing, and sometimes may even aspire to the impossible.
Expert Comment: This woman in China, a minority, especially in the birth of a child, and gradually into middle age. Such women often are psychological: First, "safe" mentality that the "revolution" Daotou, you can put Nanshan horse, so dress casually, which are no longer modified. Second, slack psychology.
That is no longer "strict demands on themselves," all so-so and just. Heart of beauty in everyone. You say that a woman can not let their husbands disappointed? Husband's lips may not say it, but knew go again. This is the real danger lies. Sentence: slovenly woman willing to do Huanglian Po careless.
Comments 3: disregard the dignity of the husband
Mr Cheung said: "I was a very low-paid do not feel the oppression of the dignity of man. One day, I would like to have just received the sum of royalties invited his wife to a restaurant for dinner, 1:00 to do to restore a man's self-esteem. During the reception, ran into two friends, so, I would venture to ask them to having dinner. do not want to settlement when the ultra-budget, my body enough money, I had to borrow to his wife. two friends laughed, Are you home is the system AA ? she was an angry, pointing out my Yu Zhi Xin Wo said: "You ask him how much money a month, he could afford to eat AA system?" finished off in a huff.
Mr. Zhang, the last sad to say: "Is man no money no dignity it? Why women do not understand that a lack of money but does not lack the dignity of man, always well developed hope; but a lack of money they are losing their dignity men, but we will forever mired in poverty. Do I hope my wife will never down and out forever? "
Expert Comments: You can satire and handsome man, but you could never laugh at a man's incompetence. Capability --- the ability to make money, as well as sexuality, Naishi two major aspects of the dignity of man. Do not feel the dignity of men tend to give up on themselves, self-esteem self-Ai. Therefore, the wise wife is always strong to protect the dignity of her husband through a variety of "rhetoric" and "technical means" to inspire her husband sail true to its feet again. Saying: do not know the husband to maintain the dignity of a woman so ignorant.
Comments 4: Love Bandwagon vain
Mr. Li is a positive level cadres. Father-in-70 year-old birthday, so the general manager gave a great son-in-high-level Rolex watches, start his own company's second son presented 10,000 yuan in cash, while Mr. Lee's gift is only a mere 1,000 yuan. Mr. Lee's wife to see them, his face immediately reveal unpleasant. Lee knew her heart feel good, quietly from under the table to reach out and pull his wife's hand, she did not want to be gearing up a fresh kick.
Mr Lee said: "My wife everything is good, too vain or too about face-saving of. Such as the child of her friend to buy a piano, her son, whether we are not interested in the piano, but also buy back at home. what's hot in the market jewelry, and she must have. In recent years, she fell in love with for mobile phones. hey, as a civil servant, stand sits the wife of such a vain, real trouble. "
Expert Comment: Some people describe a woman is the urban landscape, so if there is no mutual competition between women, contests, and how landscape will be a "perfect" mean? However, if do not follow their own economic conditions, blind comparisons, it is too vanity of. This excessive vanity often those non-"rich and powerful" man produces stress and, indeed, overwhelmed. Sentence: love a good rivalry too vain woman "terrorist."
Comments 5: caring is not every possible way
Mr Yuen did not complain about his wife, caring about nature, he acknowledged that his wife is very concerned about his daily life, but not concerned about the feelings of his soul. Fangniu Wa-born Mr Yuen said, just married, his home the next of kin came to his house, smoking without accidentally burned a hole in the carpet, his wife was furious at once, so that guests extremely embarrassing. Later, his wife is still Buyiburao warned Mr Yuen said, to tell you, Will you come home to no one, are not allowed to enter this door.
To this end, their son this year, five years old, not seen Grandpa and Grandma. Mr Yuen's parents wanted to come Chinese New Year to see the city before the grandson, he was not promised. He secretly wrote a long letter to parents, and sent several hundred dollars, do not want the matter was again found his wife, the two sides is a row.
Mr Yuen said: "I'm in his hometown's reputation have all been discredited. I have parents who lost his son at the same time, and have lost the respect of fellow villagers. Though I have repeatedly told my parents, relatives and friends, from my clay out of the ground, was cut off with their affection, but they do not believe in me. Although I live in high-rise metropolis, the family has Stepford Wives son seems very happy look. In fact, who knows my heart pain? the dead of night, I often face the direction of his hometown, to my fellow countrymen to repent in order to reduce the heart of the guilty feelings. "
Expert Comment: caring is not about nature that those who considered themselves "good wives" in a common problem. Some wives complain about her husband: For his concern with Canada, taken care of, why he was not satisfied. But she may not know consciously or unconsciously, consciously or unconsciously, ignored or belittle her husband's relatives and friends, leading to her husband's resentment. Of man and woman is not only the interaction between two people, but also involves different social relations between two people (such as relatives and friends) interaction. Ignore this social relationships, tend to deepen the Marriage "Fortress Besieged" feelings and breeding out of "Fortress Besieged" desire. Sentence: considerate woman who is not too sad about nature.
Comments 6: ignore sex
Guo complained that his marriage "no Flirt." He said the marriage five years ago, his wife in sex life has never been active before, and each had married life, she seemed very reluctant to, similar to zombies. For inspiration, she often excuse Guo recommend some knowledge of the newspapers and magazines to show her, even through the CD to come back to share with her, but her practice, or a zombie-like. Mr. Guo said that now that he is reluctant to go home after work, and even more afraid and his wife sleep in a bed, because it will be to his desire to have strong incentives. In order to escape the normal psychological needs, he fell in love with alcohol and mahjong.
Mr. Cheng and his wife are cadres. He said: "We've been married 13 years, that is, pre-marriage two years after marriage to lead a normal married life. After his wife into the pregnancy, worry about moving the tire air, I gave up." Birth of a child, the mother come to help, occupy my bed, I can only confessed. His wife, a son of months later, I returned to my bed, but she almost forgot my presence, in order to prevent snoring woke my kids, she even ordered me to move to the next room go to bed. And our children have slept six-year-old wife, the pain resolved to sub-bed, but she still has her daughter to sleep every few days to Qupei.
Occasionally there was reunion day, she is not tired, is sick. On one occasion, I may have her desperate, and she blurted out the truth: children are so big, but also do such a thing? Now, family planning, I could not have children, we might as well save some effort to to keep a good daughter, I would also avoid the scary one to the menstrual period. "Mr. Chen last distress, said:" I am a normal man, but also a structured home, but I do not live a normal middle-aged man should be family life. I am on sexual impulse, my wife slept on my side, but I have to endure the, and one taste really elusive ah. "
Expert Comment: Due to the impact of thousands of feudal ideas, people are mostly talking about sex pale, especially a woman's sexual desire is suppressed, they offered to their sexual needs were regarded as "decent" and "whore." Correspondingly, they are in the nature of marriage was only seen as a kind of in order to continue the family line, raise a family forced to whom things. This sexual attitudes of the bias, so that they stay away from sexual pleasure, sexual enjoyment, resulting in a de facto separation of sex and love. Modern marriage, sex and love should be a harmonious unity. A harmonious sexual life will not only help couples to deepen love, but also helps couples physical and mental health.
7 comments: lack of awareness of housewives
Mr. Chen and Ms. Li married two years ago. Married before he discovered that when the information that the member's wife will not do housework, but also do not understand money management. He said that his home like a kennel, where touch is gray, go where all the dirty blows. His wife's clothes have always been into the chest, and wear them always Zhouzhoubaba.
If she is to work at 8:30, it must get up until 8:10 and then start a clothing closet conveniently put onto a random tidy bathroom, put on yesterday's dirty, worn shoes, hastily out. Do not think about what to do after work, cooking, will always only do tomatoes, fried eggs, carrots, and steamed fish ף ¬. I reminded her that we have not the bachelor, and to consider how to have a good lead an easy life, and suggested that she change about their living habits, and she and I hear not a cop is to do Buda Li-like, got to We've been married three years, is still not wanting a child.
Expert Comment: housewife housewife awareness and ability are closely related, both involving women in the final analysis, how to play the role of a good family --- mainly refers to the role of a wife and mother role. There is a saying: "to seize her husband's heart, first of all to seize her husband's stomach." Of course, this argument would be too with traditional colors, but it revealed a certain truth. Poor housekeeping or household of women, the impact of marriage and family life is self-evident. "Get out of halls, Entering the kitchen," a kind of modern women should be pursued.
8 comments: casual disclosure privacy
The more Mr. Li is the most headaches, because his wife have "exposed private addiction", so he almost never had privacy. Mr. and Mrs. Yue Li a bank in the same living quarters is also banking that the couple's social circle has a half is the same. Originally this is not, yet the stand sits a like "dew private" wife, often Gaode he was very much embarrassed, impulsive, or even thought of divorce.
Mr. Li Yue, married one day soon, the office of the Block, a colleague of Mr. Li suddenly more of a look at newspaper ads athlete's foot rule, saying that his wife told her, his beriberi very serious. The face of female colleagues of this interest, the more power Mr. extremely embarrassing.
Afterwards, he reminded his wife do something that will be out at home, while she agreed, but the next time to see those "close friend", the mouth of another not control. What is more, Mr. Li Yue angry that his wife's private life even between husband and wife is also out with friends to share, and made him in front of others are feeling ashamed of themselves. Mrs. Buyiburao and the "circle" of men jokes, women jokes, which makes him very happy, he said: "My hope is that someone can cure that my wife's 'dew private addiction', so that we Some will live happy, live better. "
Expert Comments: family is the most intimate places, marriage is the most intimate relationships. Some women do not understand this, like talking about companions home in the middle of "confidential", and even between husband and wife took place in the privacy of the incident, and to each other than the peer-assessment in order to obtain some kind of mental met. In fact, this is very undesirable. It "betrayal" of not only her husband, but also a "betrayal" of himself, "betrayal" of the whole family. It is often said, the family is a warm haven. If the security of personal privacy is not assured, marriage and family life, Is still warm and get up?
Comments 9: "Control Fuyu" overtaking supply
Hoi-ho exclaimed: with a "control Fuyu" overtaking supply wife lives too much work! Hoi-ho is a salary worker handed over a monthly salary of all the wife, all expenses at home by his wife call the shots. Hoi-ho, said: "I need to concern and preparation coat outside the trousers, underwear, socks, shoes, she must get personally involved, but also with her even though I buy, I have to obey her taste.'s Pocket money in my pocket all that she had given her every week I check my wallet also how much money, questioning my place for the money. a big man in general is difficult to remember that every sum of the cost, I do not have to be reported out of money, "link" In the oil on a motorcycle.
Last year, I began to prepare to do business, social activities increased, expenses have also increased. Every time a meal with others, and she asked me who should pay? If I pay, it is necessary to tell her that exact number. But she still knew me and whom to eat, and we talked about? May be out of a revenge, I have done first after a single business, quietly Liu Qi on the part of the money did not tell her, I mainly want to avoid her control.
But she was removed even have the ability to find my partner, to know everything. The catastrophe came, I had to confess to her. Later, I truthfully told her: I do so want to get rid of her control, do not want their Zuoqishilai less intrusive. However, she finds that I was attempting something else. In her view: since become a husband and wife, have a common child, 2 1 / 2 together becomes a one, so she must know everything --- the other half, including some of the details. I can not accept this theory to her, but also Shuofubule her, our family life in this "control" and "anti-control" between the ground next to a hard day by day.
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